It’s your wedding. If you want to wear a bright red outfit, go for it! If you dream of dining on pizza and ice cream sundaes at the reception, do it! And, if you have your heart set on asking a favorite gal pal to stand in as your best man, don’t think twice. You’re customizing every aspect of your big day, so you should do exactly what you want.
When your best man is a woman — or more appropriately — your best woman, there are a few extra considerations you’ll want to take when choosing formalwear for the bridal party, drafting titles in your ceremony programs and deciding how to conduct your processional. Here’s a handy guide to personalize your wedding and make the day run smooth.
Include Your Best Woman With the Groomsmen
She should assume all the duties generally assigned to a best man, including standing with the groomsmen during the ceremony, planning the bachelor party and walking in the processional alongside the maid or matron of honor. Now when it comes to attending the bachelor party, let her decide. Does she feel more comfortable going for a guys night out or joining the bride and maids for the bachelorette party? She can do one, or both!
Don’t Assume Your Best Woman Wants to Tag Along With the Girls
Chances are, the best woman is best friends with the groom. There’s no reason to ask her to hang out with the bridal party if she isn’t already friends with them. Dress fittings, bridal showers and hair appointments with strangers might make her feel out of place. If she’s more comfortable hanging with the guys, that’s totally fine.
Let Her Choose Her Wedding Day Attire
As the best woman standing next to the groomsmen, your lady of honor has a few choices when it comes to formalwear. If she’s most comfortable in a tuxedo, there are female styles made to fit her perfectly. Choose accessories that coordinate with the groomsmen, or have her match the maid of honor if she is wearing something different than the bridesmaids. If your best woman prefers a dress, she can match the colors of the groomsmen, maid of honor or bridesmaids.
Don’t Give Her a Label She Hates
Although the phrase “best woman” is pretty popular, it’s your ceremony. Give people whatever labels you want. She can be your best dude, grooms-woman, grooms-person or even the groom’s honor attendant. Talk to her about what title she likes and run with it. As long as you both are happy with the final decision, that’s all that matters.
Let Your Photographer Know
It’s pretty common to give your wedding day photographer a list of the bridal party attendees, so no one is left out of large group poses. Take an extra moment to let the photographer know where your best woman should be placed — with the men or the women — when doing specific groupings. Most photographers work through a list of posed shots weeks before the wedding, so you won’t have to carve out extra time on the big day.
Don’t Exclude Your Spouse’s Picks
Finally, what if both the bride and the groom have someone special in mind to serve as the best man or best woman? You can have two people stand up for the groom in the ‘best’ position. If you do, consider having two maids of honor to balance the flow of the bridal party. It’s not uncommon for couples who have several siblings to have multiple honorable attendees in their bridal party. If you want to give more than one person a prestigious title at your wedding, do it! That’s the bonus of it being your day.
As you prepare for the big day, take a moment to browse Jim’s Formal Wear online. Sit back, relax and put together the perfect tuxedos for the groom, groomsmen, and if she loves the tailored look of a tux, your best woman too!